That was actually really sick, I really liked it.
One thing you might want to do is more color grading to really get the most out of your camera (brighten it up a little, change the colors to give the shots a unique look, etc.)
You should also never show a dolly movement starting or stopping within a shot, at least for the type of shots you were doing. The shots should start and end with camera movement.
Other than that, you did a great job with it.