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UFISHUL: NS GRAMIR THRED

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no_steeze
Posts: 23992 - Karma: 4,267
Dear NS,

yer gramirz bin haz bad latly and anoiz me so we try fix it now kthx

This is mainly a personal affair, for I, and many other non-ruhtards, feel as though the grammar on NS lately has struck a level that is lower than brutal. Not only does it make me want to kill a kitten using an indian blow dart gun, but it makes me unable to take anyone seriously. Now you're probably bitching to yourself and thinking I'm a douchebag grammar nazi...well I AM, deal with it. I think NS's intelligence level could be raised slightly with the usage of some proper grammar and then we won't get shat on for being a bunch of baked 14 year olds.

Now, many of us, including myself, spend the majority of our free time on NS. If we learn acceptable grammar habits, it will prepare us for the real world. Honestly I'm just looking for an excuse to convince you guys. If you write "defenetliy" on an application to become an English teacher, you will not get said job.

Also, pertaining to b/s/t, grammar goes a long way towards sounding like a sophisticated person who could follow through with a professional transaction, not a 12 year old who just snagged your mom's credit card.

I have a few points to help keep me from teetering on the edge of suicide:

1- Pay attention in English class, it's actually kinda fun
2- Take a minute before hitting 'Reply' and read the goddam post...most of you will find yourselves deleting a lot more than you'd think.
3- If NS underlines a word in red, right click and get the proper spelling
4- Read the following guidelines:

Your = possessive. Example: "Your size extra-small jacket is incredibly fucking gay"

You're = IT IS SIMPLY YOU AND ARE JOINED!!! Example: "You're incredibly fucking gay"

Their = possessive. Example: "Their cat is incredibly fucking gay"

There = use it to describe a location or something in a location. Example: "There is an incredibly fucking gay kid on the roof of Taco Bell"

They're = THEY and ARE joined. Example: "Look at Bob and Steve. They're incredibly fucking gay"

D-E-F-I-N-I-T-E-L-Y = I don't care what kind of deviation you use, the spelling of that word will DEFINITELY never change.

Now, it is YOUR goal to post more corrections, just so people have some idea what the fuck they're doing

Honestly this thread is gonna either get deleted or lost, but it just felt good to type that out. I'm gonna go clean the sand out of my vagina

Sincerely,

Some fucking nit picky asshole

P.S. As an early response to all the clever intentional misuses of grammar to follow in this thread, congratulations, you are original
Oct 28 2009 7:53PM
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Crack.
Posts: 6020 - Karma: 86
I agree, yo!
Oct 28 2009 7:55PM
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a_pla5tic_bag
Posts: 9210 - Karma: 5,357
Were and we're are not the same!
Oct 28 2009 7:59PM
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7-11_Slurpee
Posts: 1142 - Karma: 1,552
I completely agree. Unless you have a legitimate excuse like "English is not my first language" then honestly; put some effort into your posting.
Oct 28 2009 7:59PM
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C-DAWGSTYLEZ
Posts: 832 - Karma: 171
I have never understood the grammar police on this site. It's funny to point out a few spelling mistakes now and again, but as long as someone gets their point across does it really matter?
Lighten up dood they're just werdz.
Oct 28 2009 7:59PM
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123ski
Posts: 7374 - Karma: 1,415
unfortunately

i have a hard time with this word as much as the next person...but practice makes perfect
Oct 28 2009 8:00PM
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pussymoneyweed
Posts: 2055 - Karma: 60
Question: Whai iz grammar importaint?
My answer:

One of the most lucid and sensible answers to this question appeared a few years ago in--of all places--a position statement on the teaching of grammar in American schools. Published by the National Council of Teachers of English (NCTE), the report is blessedly free of educational cant. Here's how it begins:

Grammar is important because it is the language that makes it possible for us to talk about language. Grammar names the types of words and word groups that make up sentences not only in English but in any language. As human beings, we can put sentences together even as children--we can all do grammar. But to be able to talk about how sentences are built, about the types of words and word groups that make up sentences--that is knowing about grammar. And knowing about grammar offers a window into the human mind and into our amazingly complex mental capacity.

People associate grammar with errors and correctness. But knowing about grammar also helps us understand what makes sentences and paragraphs clear and interesting and precise. Grammar can be part of literature discussions, when we and our students closely read the sentences in poetry and stories. And knowing about grammar means finding out that all languages and all dialects follow grammatical patterns.

Imagine that: a document prepared by a committee (NCTE's Assembly for the Teaching of English Grammar) that doesn't sound like a committee. The voice, in fact, belongs to Brock Haussamen, professor of English at Raritan Valley Community College of New Jersey. And whether or not you teach English for a living, the full report, "Some Questions and Answers About Grammar," is well worth reading.

EVEN HIPERLINKED FER U GAIZ

Oct 28 2009 8:02PM
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charmander
Posts: 10636 - Karma: 372
Good job man, I agree.
Oct 28 2009 8:03PM
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.Emerson.
Posts: 1548 - Karma: 16
Sticky, I even put a capital on it.
Oct 28 2009 8:04PM
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baethoven
Posts: 4953 - Karma: 332
quality thread. i'll come out and say it now, shitty grammer bugs me.
Oct 28 2009 8:07PM
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short_and_steezy
Posts: 760 - Karma: 18

That was funny. But I agree

Oct 28 2009 8:08PM
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*steeze_is_good
Posts: 2885 - Karma: 718
The worst is when someone corrects spelling and spells something wrong
Oct 28 2009 8:11PM
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OldManFinkyBeans
Posts: 217 - Karma: 16

im horrible at english and grammar, but i try!

Oct 28 2009 8:12PM
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syrup.
Posts: 644 - Karma: 302
I completely agree with everything you said. Especially the "English class can be fun" part. English is a very fun subject once you get into it, and instead of completely slaughtering the language people should learn to use words properly.
Oct 28 2009 8:12PM
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Ben.
Posts: 21463 - Karma: 683
and for fucks sake. its retard. not retart. nothing makes you sound more moronic than misspelling retard of all things.


in general though, i concur. reading some of the shit i read on here makes me wonder how these kids even survive school.
Oct 28 2009 8:13PM
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Big_Spence
Posts: 16177 - Karma: 4,352
gr8 thr3@d.
Oct 28 2009 8:21PM
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wintersway
Posts: 5115 - Karma: 128
definitely agree

plus, my computer has a spelling/grammar checker and i am sure that many others have this too. spelling shouldn't really be an issue unless it is a really hard word
Oct 28 2009 8:21PM
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TechnoPotamus
Posts: 11626 - Karma: 3,522
sticky this. asap. please.
Oct 28 2009 8:22PM
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dex.
Posts: 2973 - Karma: 62
its spelled RIDICULOUS not rediculous
Oct 28 2009 8:23PM
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pianoman
Posts: 2503 - Karma: 779
i hate to sound like an asshole to the OP, but your grammar isn't even very good. not that i care much about NS grammar, but there are a bunch of things i'd correct in your post.
Oct 28 2009 8:23PM
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SHD
Posts: 397 - Karma: 83
Sticky this! Me, having English as my second language can write better than a lot of the fools here. And guess what? Some times I can't even understand what some of these retards are saying! Sticky ASAP.
Oct 28 2009 8:27PM
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pianoman
Posts: 2503 - Karma: 779
Me can write better than you, too.
Oct 28 2009 8:37PM
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Canuker
Posts: 4730 - Karma: 165

I'd have to agree with you on this. Although my grammar and spelling are atrocious the majority of the time, this is merely because i am lazy. This maybe adding to the problem but alot of the time when i am on sites such as this sounding proper and fromal is not one of my priorties.

That being said, the fact that you have expressed how this "gramir" issue is one of your pet-peeves, I will do my part and watch my spelling, grammar and sentence structure more closely from now on.

Oct 28 2009 8:38PM
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no_steeze
Posts: 23992 - Karma: 4,267
aside from my failure to use commas which i'm working on, what's wrong?
Oct 28 2009 8:38PM
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no_steeze
Posts: 23992 - Karma: 4,267
also, congratulations! you, sir, are "that guy"
Oct 28 2009 8:41PM
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babujib
Posts: 5039 - Karma: 104
Your comma knowledge is horrendous. Ergo, I am forced to cast this thread aside as invalid.
Oct 28 2009 8:46PM
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daringharry.
Posts: 476 - Karma: 9
yo dis is great yo
Oct 28 2009 8:49PM
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Malcolm
Posts: 15949 - Karma: 9,417
i cant handle the stress of having to spell shit correctly all the time
Oct 28 2009 8:50PM
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dwhite
Posts: 1499 - Karma: 32
I do have to admit, I try to pride my self on using good grammar. But, when i'm on the internet, I don't really care about how I write my responses. It's not like i am writing some college essay or something, I just write the first things that pop into my head. However, for the integrity of this site, I will try to choose better language.

You can probably tell that I just put way too much thought and effort into that response.
Oct 28 2009 8:54PM
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ROOS.
Posts: 1992 - Karma: 39
imagine how much more stressful it will be when you're ostracized for using incorrect grammar versus proofing your fifteen word post so there will be no stress placed upon you about posting a grammatically correct post
Oct 28 2009 8:55PM
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pianoman
Posts: 2503 - Karma: 779
i didn't make a thread about grammar, because i personally don't care nearly as much about it as you do. i'm just pointing out that you are being hypocritical. so fuck off. if you still want me to show you what errors i'm talking about in your original post, i'd be happy to.


Dear NS,

yer gramirz bin haz bad latly and anoiz me so we try fix it now kthx

This is mainly a personal affair, for I, (NO NEED FOR PARENTHETICAL COMMAS) and many other non-ruhtards, feel as though the grammar on NS lately has struck a level that is lower than brutal. Not only does it make me want to kill a kitten using an indian blow dart gun, but it (IT'S BETTER TO ADD THE WORD "ALSO") makes me unable to take anyone seriously. (TO MAKE UNABLE=TO DISABLE --AWKWARD WORDING) Now you're probably bitching to yourself and thinking I'm a douchebag grammar nazi...well I AM, (SEMICOLON) deal with it. I think NS's intelligence level could be raised slightly with the usage of some proper grammar and then we won't get shat on for being a bunch of baked 14 year olds.

Now, (INCONSISTENT PUNCTUATION) many of us, including myself, spend the majority of our free time on NS. If we learn acceptable grammar habits, ("WE WILL BE PREPARED"--CONSISTENCY IS KEY) it will prepare us for the real world. Honestly (COMMA) I'm just looking for an excuse to convince you guys. If you write "defenetliy" on an application to become an English teacher, you will not get said job.

Also, pertaining to b/s/t, (COLON) grammar goes a long way towards (MAKING YOU SOUND) sounding like a sophisticated person who could follow through with a professional transaction, not a 12 year old who just snagged your (HIS) mom's credit card.

I have a few points to help keep me from teetering on the edge of suicide:

1- Pay attention in English class, (SEMICOLON INSTEAD OF COMMA) it's actually kinda fun
2- Take a minute before hitting 'Reply' and read the goddam post...most of you will find yourselves deleting a lot more than you'd think.
3- If NS underlines a word in red, right click and get the proper spelling
4- Read the following guidelines:

Your = possessive. Example: "Your size extra-small jacket is incredibly fucking gay"

You're = IT IS SIMPLY (USE QUOTATION MARKS) YOU AND ARE JOINED!!! Example: "You're incredibly fucking gay"

Their = possessive. Example: "Their cat is incredibly fucking gay"

There = use it to describe a location or something in a location. Example: "There is an incredibly fucking gay kid on the roof of Taco Bell"

They're = THEY and ARE joined. Example: "Look at Bob and Steve. They're incredibly fucking gay"

D-E-F-I-N-I-T-E-L-Y = I don't care what kind of deviation you use, (SEMICOLON) the spelling of that word will DEFINITELY never change.

Now, it is YOUR goal to post more corrections, just so people have some idea what the fuck they're doing

Honestly (COMMA) this thread is gonna either get deleted or lost, but it just felt good to type that out. I'm gonna go clean the sand out of my vagina

Sincerely,

Some fucking nit picky asshole

P.S. As an early response to all the clever intentional misuses of grammar to follow in this thread, (COLON) congratulations, you are original



Sincerely,

Some fucking nit picky asshole

P.S. I'm not an expert, so I could stand corrected on some of my corrections.
Oct 28 2009 9:00PM
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Chris.S
Posts: 881 - Karma: 30
i fucking hate commas. They're so confusing sometimes. Another mistake that I haven't necessarily seen here, but have seen on other websites is the word "Tomarrow"...The word is "Tomorrow". Are and Our have different meanings also, for those of you wondering. I'm adding to this because I'm pretty sure the OP asked us to.

Don't know if you mentioned this, but "to" and "too" are different. I think most people know that difference though. I figured i would add it on just in case.
(ex) A small jacket, is at least three sizes TOO small.
We are going TO do something.
Oct 28 2009 9:01PM
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BootySpunk.
Posts: 8148 - Karma: 84
yer gramirz bin haz bad latly and anoiz me so we try fix it now kthx

Such a hypocrite zomg you spelled all of those words wrong!!!

But seriously some people seem like they must be typing with their feet. And commas are stupid as shit and this isn't some super strict grammar site where everything must be perfect I think he was just asking that some simple common GRADE SCHOOL grammar be used.
Oct 28 2009 9:12PM
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1337
Posts: 31038 - Karma: 29,000
I was planning on making this thread; I can't fucking stand how bad some people's grammar is. Thank you sir! +K
Oct 28 2009 9:13PM
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no_steeze
Posts: 23992 - Karma: 4,267
i'm the first to say that i fail miserably at using commas
Oct 28 2009 9:14PM
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no_steeze
Posts: 23992 - Karma: 4,267
yeah that's exactly what i was getting at. this doesn't need to be pro grammar here, just some commonsensical grade school grammar that can save me from shooting myself
Oct 28 2009 9:16PM
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T-Holt
Posts: 5020 - Karma: 639
This thread is actually good.  And for people bitching about the commas, yeah, it's kind of hypocritical, but I don't find improper comma usage nearly as annoying as messing up things like your and you're, their, there, and they're, were and we're.  Also, commas are much more difficult to understand completely than the aforementioned problems.
Oct 28 2009 9:18PM
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Squid.
Posts: 1904 - Karma: 23
your so gay their deffanitley isnt any good uses for grammer
Oct 28 2009 9:19PM
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dwhite
Posts: 1499 - Karma: 32
That was some pretty sweet comma usage right there.
Oct 28 2009 9:20PM
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pianoman
Posts: 2503 - Karma: 779
yes, i understand that. my point isn't that everyone should have perfect grammar on this site; in fact, i use terrible grammar on NS. i guess i was being a bitch about it, but i was just trying to point out that it seemed weird to me that he was going off about how important grammar is for your career, etc. while making mistakes in the process.

he is forgiven. i apologize. i now agree with his points, and i no longer really wish to argue over the details.
Oct 28 2009 9:21PM
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no_steeze
Posts: 23992 - Karma: 4,267
yeah dude i was never saying ns should be come nazi occupied germany in terms of grammar, i'd just like to see some effort put into posts as opposed to typing something out at full speed and hitting reply without even reading over said post.

if we cracked down on things such as commas, ns would become miserable, however I think it's perfectly reasonable to ask for simple 3rd grade grammar

i still don't understand fucking commas, i hate them, and i tend to misuse them much more on the internet than on school papers and shit. i also capitalize nothing on the internet because word auto-capitalizes everything for me, basically meaning i'm a lazy fuck
Oct 28 2009 9:27PM
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kstanz
Posts: 3058 - Karma: 477
uz like so stupid i dont care if my gramir is worng on newschoolers its not english class let me not have to worry about more sutpids school stuff
Oct 28 2009 9:27PM
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T-Holt
Posts: 5020 - Karma: 639
I suck at commas, but I try my best.
Oct 28 2009 9:28PM
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TURTLEMAN1
Posts: 655 - Karma: 9
completely agree
Oct 28 2009 9:28PM
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daringharry.
Posts: 476 - Karma: 9
i respectfully disagree
Oct 28 2009 9:30PM
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pianoman
Posts: 2503 - Karma: 779
it's aight dude. i feel ya. i guess i took it too seriously when you said you are a grammar nazi haha
Oct 28 2009 9:32PM
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no_steeze
Posts: 23992 - Karma: 4,267
this whole thing was kinda meant to be a joke...but i wanted to get this point across
Oct 28 2009 9:35PM
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syrup.
Posts: 644 - Karma: 302
no_steeze: thank you for making this thread.
Oct 28 2009 9:37PM
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Frank_Spinatra
Posts: 1203 - Karma: 75
LEARN TO SPELL OR SEALS WILL DIE

Click for larger image
Oct 28 2009 9:45PM
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syrup.
Posts: 644 - Karma: 302
CLUB SODA NOT SEALS!
Oct 28 2009 9:49PM
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Elijah.
Posts: 9322 - Karma: 76
Using correct grammar pleases Mr. Connery.

Oct 28 2009 9:50PM
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