Patroler - "What if after you ducked that line you caused an avalanche and buried us all?" Me - "Do you know where I can pick up a Colorado Fishing License?" Patroler - "Okay, you can go."
"cause when I smoke out I hit the trees harder than Sonny Bono" - E
Cop pulls me over, is patting me down and grabs the satchel in my pocket, Cop says, "Well, at least its not crack."