Tonight I had to attend an art auction for my old school to raise some money for them. Although they are a private school, few people attend and in order to not raise the tuition they run nice things like this to gain money. I, as tradition stands, was a runner for them. I handle some $2,000 pieces of art the whole night, brining them back and forth from one table to another to the easel where people bid on them. Most of the people there buy one maybe two pieces but some of the other, more prominent people buy 6-8 things. One person however caught everyones attention by buying piece after piece totaling up to id like to say 5 grand. This character is what I call a bitch ass drunk rich blond hoe. Upon buying these many pieces of art she drank a grand total of 2 bottles of wine, which as one could figure probabbly led to the spending of 5 grand. this drunkness lasted throughout the night and did not know it untill the end of the night where I had to encounter it. I was in the hallway helping everyone get their art work that was purchased. Bitch ass drunk rich blond hoe comes over with two of her sober companions to collect their possessions. I find out that all three of them where using one bidding card and where trying to sort out whos is whos. I ask if they need help, get their art work numbers and go to fetch the paintings. I come to number 123. This painting is a fairly big and has a heavy frame. It was behind three other fairly big paintings so I attempted to lean the three that were in front of it on my knee and try to lift number 123 out from behind. I am doing this with not the best skill in the world and I quickly find myself in a position where something might go wrong. Bitch ass drunk rich blond hoe sees this and offers me a helping hand asking if she can take her painting so I can fix the three big ones that are so clumsily leaning on my knee. I hand her the painting and fixate the paintings on me knee to lean back against the wall where they will not fall. At this point I hear a crash behind me. I turn around to find the painting I just handed the bitch ass drunk rich blond hoe on the floor with broken glass. Im thinking oh that sucks and go on with my work. The two sober companions look up and are go who did that!? Immeditally the bitch ass drunk rich blond hoe goes "It was him!". I turn around with fury and rage and go "excuse me?". The Companions realize it was not me and ask "Sandy, you dropped the painting didnt you?" She goes "no it was him" and points to me like a 8 year old who just broke a vase. At this point I realize she is drunk. I dont care though. Someone blammed me for something I did not do and I was pissed. I look at her in the eyes and go "bull crap!". Bitch ass drunk blond hoe goes "well I dunno, its not my fault, hes gotta pay for it" At this point I am furious. One of my friends grandmother who is watching the whole thing comes over to me and goes "let it go" and so I do and go back to doing my work. Not even two minutes later she comes back still drunk thinking I actually work here and get payed and goes "can you boss your get? maybe he can fix this" At this point the companions go " Sandy, shut up. I think its better if you just dont say anything". She continues to blame me for the whole thing. In the end I calmly walk away to go tell my mother and my friend this story which they both laughed at. Moral of the story folks. Unless your going to screw them, dont go near bitch ass drunk rich blond hoes. Theyll blame you for everything. Thee end
3's and 7's
73% of NS actually thinks I wrote the "Without volition I screamed my battle cry....." thread.
I had a dream last night that I was friends with Ellen Degeneras. I talked to her when she was jogging by and we were standing in snow... I had no skis on... I was walking. Then some lady stopped in her car, took a picture then drove off. God help me.- Skiierman
"Fuck the bullshit, this-is-it, lets go!" - Jamal