So, me and my friend went to the pool in our neighborhood. You have to understand that our neighborhood isn't the nicest place. My neighbors on one side have been arrested for making amphetamines and the ones on the other side were arrested for selling cocaine. Then there's these two guys who get drunk every night and throw stuff at the houses and then call the little girls who play jumprope 'dirty sluts who should go back to fucking Mexico.' So, it's not the greatest place in the world. Anyway, we went to the pool, and we're just swimming around and then all of a sudden my friend goes 'Oh my God, is that shit?' So I spun around, and floating behind me in the pool is this big brown clump. It's either a log of shit or a very weird looking pinecone. So we jumped out and grabbed the pole that you use to rescue drowning people and poked it to see what it was and broke into all these chunks and then we realized it was definetely shit. So we hauled ass to the manager's house and she shut down the pool then we each went home and I took the longest shower ever and just kept soaping up repeatedly. The worst part is some water probably got in my mouth so I could have E. Coli and I won't know for sure unless I start puking uncontrollably in a week. What I want to know is who took a shit in the pool. It wasn't a dog cause you're not allowed to own dogs where I live. Whoever it was should die. Oh well thanks for listening to my story.
Would you like freedom fries with that?
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